Mind Games And Depression

This blog has been written to spread awareness about World MenTal Health Day. 

Husband: You are angry with me
Wife: No, I just feel depressed
Husband: Are you unhappy with me? Is that why?
Wife: No, It's not you.
Husband: Then you hate being married to me. 
Wife: It's not about you all the time. Its just about me. And I don't want to talk about it.

And so it starts the series of unsaid words and tangled relationships. And sometimes it's just not anyone but you. But how can anyone make sure that the word's out there and depression is not just an attention gaining scheme of anyone but just something that's messed up the mind and you simply feel worthless and all alone.

It's how all you say starts with a dullness- an ache that you cannot finger point on and then it progresses to being a little more quiet than usual. People who love you, care about you, seem like strangers and you wonder why they are still hanging around and looking at you as if you just are here to spoil everyone's mood.

But Depression is not something that you can help it. Circumstances, failed relationships and sometimes aspirations that have never been met might be the causes of it.

Things to look for if you find your partner/friends/family depressed:

1. Nil participation in conversations
2. No reaction for any joke or laughter around
3. Sluggish moments and disorganisation at home
4. No interest in sex or family life
5. Eat in excess or doesn't eat at all

How can you help?

1. Just let them know you are there for them
2. Try to distract them by doing some positive activities together- like gymming, walking, going to a fun park
3. Read about it and have a serious talk.
4. Let them cry and just hug 

If you have depression:

1. Involve yourself totally in recreational activities- Like painting, Quilling, reading, even blogging about it.
2. Have a feelings journal. Vent out and then never read it again.
3. Talk about how you feel to someone you trust. 
4. Seek professional help- like Roshini NGO who provide anonymous phone consultation.
5. Therapies like Reiki, Yoga and high power exercise.  

Deepika Padukone, You are my Hero! Here is Why...

Why are we so reluctant to talk about Depression? Its because I suffer frequently from this too. I have not really talked about it to anyone except my husband. I tell him at times that I don't ever want to wake up or that i often think about suicide- I know. I seem to have a perfect life. I have a loving family, enough money, a beautiful baby then why should I feel as if my world is shattering in front of me? Sometimes you really do not need answers to such questions. I kind of blame it on my post pregnancy blues because I still suffer from it. And the responsibilities seem to never end at times.

And that was why I started blogging a long time ago to keep my mind busy with things other than just my family. Taking care of a toddler can be tiring and you need to understand that I live alone without help. I do not believe in having a nanny and that could have been my greatest flaw. I never ever took help. And so now I am highly strung and try to be a perfectionist when it comes to things because I feel as if I can be the only one who can do justice to the job. And being in a marriage when you are husband is busy can also take a toll on you. Yes, I do not want to wash my dirty linen in public but it gets lonely at times. And a woman needs people around her to tell her that she is loved. But ten years in a relationship and routine changes the way it had been. And that's why I talk about my feelings to my partner. Knowing that he would understand and give me the time to recoup because yes, depression makes you feel sick and helpless. At times I just want to sleep away and never face the world. Meeting people becomes a chore because then I would have to laugh and talk when my heart's says otherwise. Yes, I am coming to terms with it now. I know that there will be times that will make me feel as if I don't belong in this world. My artistic streak is sensitive and i get hurt pretty soon. Tears come and go without prior notice. I always think about meeting up with a psychologist but that only makes me feel ashamed. It is important for me to talk about it though. And I write a journal that has nothing to do with writing a blog that's open to a public.  

Writing about it has made me feel better. I know most of you will be shocked but then that's the truth of life.